My brothers and sisters in Christ,
Thank you for all the cards you have sent expressing your sympathy for my dad’s passing. His service will be this Friday in Flagstaff, AZ. Patty & I will be flying out on Thursday and come back on Sunday. If anyone needs pastoral help, Ted Nelson will be available. Give Eloide a call and she will put you in touch with him. Some of you are beginning to know this young man. He has been singing in our choir for about a month or so. He is discerning presently to join our church.
If you haven’t met Ted, you will love him. He is a delightful young man. He is currently working as a Chaplain for the OSF system. He is a perfect fit for anyone needing care. Our usual members who have helped out in the past are all attending a Via de Christo weekend during this time. Very much of a blessing to be able to use people in our congregation in leadership positions. You and I are very blessed.
It has been a rough couple of weeks. Besides my dad, I sadly report that Betty Ristau passed away last weekend. She has been a long-time member of St. John’s. I have only known her in the nursing home. Others remember her as an active member of our church. I visited Bernice Menne last Sunday, and she gushed over Betty as a good friend. The funeral service will be on Tuesday, October 21, at 11:00 a.m. at St. John’s. Visitation will also be at the church at 10:00 a.m.
And then we had the mother of Dennis Focci pass away also this weekend. She was also the mother-in-law of Carlene. Dennis is the man we go to with any electrical problems. He also helped me with my scooter. Carlene is all over the church. We need to send our love and prayers to this family. It has been a rough go for them. We need to flood this family with our cards, also.
We have been using the word “bittersweet” lately. It certainly applies to my dad. The word “sweet” applies because he is no longer suffering. My dad is definitely at peace. The word “bitter” applies to the rest of us he has left behind. I would usually call him at least once a week just to touch base and see how he was doing. I knew I’d better set aside about an hour. I probably spoke about 10 minutes of those 60 minutes. Probably the biggest item he suffered with is loneliness. He outlived two wives and all his friends. Being lonely is awful. What scares your pastor is that, despite being able to connect to people all around the world, the people in their teens and twenties are called the loneliest generation. Don’t let the computer or video games take the place of parenting. We need to step up.
Again, the spaghetti dinner was a great success. I’m sure Missy or Eloide will share the final details, but I know they came close to selling all the tickets printed. Thank you to all who played a part in its success.
I want to ask your forgiveness for those who attended Sunday’s service. I could have handled that so much better. For those who did not attend, we had a family who struggled with their young children. It seems that all of them had a rough morning. Their voices were probably the loudest during the sermon. Chances are, most of you did not get anything out of this time.
The question for me still remains how I could have handled it better (My wife and I do not agree on possible solutions). I think the first thing that bothers me is that we ask our children to do more than we do ourselves. We expect them to be at Sunday School for an hour and then hopefully at church for an hour. We don’t ask the adults to do this (I know that some of you do in Paul’s Bible Study). The other thing that bothered me is these parents clearly needed help. 3 children versus 2 parents, they were outnumbered. What I am asking forgiveness for is not helping them out. I could have been the third adult, evening the odds. The youngest one clearly likes being held. Gerlyn demonstrated that to all of us on Saturday when she held the youngest while assisting me. He was precious.
Not sure if I know of the solution. I know it does not exclusively fall in my lap. I think it needs to be addressed by a number of people. You know my stand. Bottom line: I want them at church. We currently do not have a room for them to go. The two places that people can hear what is happening at church are the Narthex and Fellowship Hall. If we have a children’s room in one of our classrooms, why bother coming? They won’t be able to hear anything. Could they stay at home and watch online? Maybe? I don’t know their story. We have a number of people in our congregation who do not have internet service. Plus, one of the drives by the Church Council is to bring people back to church. That would go against what we are trying to do.
I am conflicted. All I know is I did not do the right thing. I know if I ever see downturned faces towards me if I were in this situation, I would not come back to the church. All are welcome… right, as long as they don’t make a fuss?
Before I get calls, emails, or texts, I would like you all to look at your role in this situation. Along with Pastor, could you have handled this better?
Crossed marked and spirit sealed,
Pastor Tom
815-223-1144
Readings for the 19 Weekend after Pentecost– Weekend of October 18 & 19.
Genesis 32:22-31 Psalm 121 2 Timothy 3:14-4:5 Luke 18:1-8